Desperate

I am obviously not the happiest person living on earth right now. But, not the saddest one too. I do have some regrets, but there are still so much more things that I should be grateful about. And about the way I live, there are way too much people who feel like I shouldn’t be doing what I am doing right now. Well, I understand their point of view.

Sometimes, I do think about it. About what should I do in this time being and in the near future. Like what kind of person I want to be. What kind of thing I enjoy doing. What kind of people I love the most. And still don’t get the answer. Sometimes I just think of this one wild idea of travelling around the world to find the true meaning of this life.

I am that desperate. And it’s not because I am not happy. I am happy. But deep inside my heart I know that happy is not our final destination.

Parigi : Makan Apa?

Makan apa kurang lebih adalah satu pertanyaan paling krusial yang setidaknya akan ditanyakan sekali dalam sehari. Itu pun kalau beruntung, kalau tidak beruntung ya bisa berkali-kali :p. Namanya juga anak rantau yang penuh kesibukan (kerja lembur bagai quda), masak cuma bisa dilakukan sekali-kali di weekend dan otomatis waktu makan siang dan makan malam menjadi waktu-waktu yang paling bikin dilema.

Mau makan apa?

Find Your Own Voice

I’ve been always wanted to make my own blog since the very start of my college days. But I couldn’t do it. Not because I lack of internet connection, nor another technical reason. But, I just feel so fake the time I started writing. I tried so hard to be sound like another blogger. I tried hard to looks like I was having so much fun with my life when in fact, I wasn’t.

Back then, it’s hard to voice out what’s actually on my mind because I was too worried about what people could say about my writing. I was afraid that if someone I know read my blog then it makes them think out loud that it’s not really sound like me. I was just think too much about things that didn’t really matter. So, I always stop at the front door of my dream.

Yeah, start making my blog and post it regularly is one of  my dream. I want to let out what’s on my mind. Share to the world about the new ideas or experiences and tell them that I can learn so many things thanks to that experiences. That thing seriously can become impossible to do when I don’t have any confidence and just surrounded by so many insecurities. And when you are in this kind of situation, your own voice can be nowhere to be seen.

Now that I finally can let go of a thousands worries of my daily thoughts, I can finally speak by my own voice. It’s not easy actually to find it. Because sometimes, I still lost it. Well, I still want to write like my favorite writer, I still want to be an inspiration for other people. But at the time when I feel like what I write or what I tell you isn’t something  that I want to share, I stop. And wait a little bit more until my own little voice comeback to me and whispering ideas to me.

So, I know that sometimes it’s hard to start writing your own voice or opinion and you tend to sound like the one that inspire you or you could sound like a totally different person. But, if you have to start anyway, here is my little tips.

First, pick your topic. After you feel sure about your topic, start writing anyway. Don’t even start to look at other people’s writing about the same topic because it will ruin your initial idea about the topic. When you write, forget about all the ‘How if … ‘s that can ruin your mood to write. Just write like how you write a diary, a very secret one. So that you can feel comfortable to let out the little voice of you.

Believe me, people read your writing because they want to know your opinion, not because they expect a perfect writing from you. And the more vulnerable you are, the more people will feel relate to your writing.

So, happy writing 🙂

Buol : Aqiqahnya Gaudia Maharani

Kalau kalian bertanya-tanya siapa itu Gaudia Maharani, dengan senang hati saya akan menjawab keponakan pertamaku yang juga merupakan cucu pertama di keluarga besar kami di Buol. Dan jika kalian bertanya kenapa namanya Gaudia, mungkin harus kujawab bahwa ibunya Gaudia yang tidak lain dan tidak bukan adalah kakak kandungku memang adalah orang yang agak nyentrik. Jadi, Gaudia terinspirasi dari nama arsitek terkenal Antoni Gaudi, yang namanya agung sekali seantero Barcelona. Dialah arsitek yang merancang bangunan-bangunan megah nan unik seperti Casa Mila dan Sagrada Familia yang sampai saat ini pun pembangunannya masih belum selesai.

Smile : The Best Make-up A Woman Can Wear

Often times, we look in the mirror, looking for any imperfection in our own face. Then we realize that our skin is just far than gorgeous. They are oily sometimes, or too dry. They are too red sometimes, or too pale. They have some big pores, there are also blackheads and whiteheads. Still not counting the pimple problems.

Buol : Pantai Negeri Lama

Bukan orang Buol namanya kalau tidak kenal dengan Pantai Negeri Lama. Pantai yang terletak kurang lebih 10 km jauhnya dari pusat kota Buol ini memang selalu menjadi primadona bukan hanya di kalangan anak muda tapi juga keluarga yang ingin bersantai di sore hari sembari menikmati kudapan khas Buol yang tentunya merupakan favorit semua orang.

Traveler’s Tale : Belok Kanan, Barcelona!

Judul  : Traveler’s Tale Belok Kanan, Barcelona!

Penulis : Adhitya Mulya, Alaya Setya, Iman Hidajat, Ninit Yunita

Penerbit : Gagas Media

Jumlah Halaman : 219

 

Traveling, it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.

-Ibn Battuta

Well, pertama kali tertarik beli buku ini tentu saja karena dari segi judul ini sudah amat sangat menarik. Barcelona. How shining that word is. Jadi begini, sejak baca buku Origin karyanya Dan Brown yang sebagian besar ceritanya bertempat di Barcelona, saya sudah jatuh cinta dengan kota itu. Penceritaan Dan Brown yang mendetail dan cerita tentang bangunan-bangunan iconic Barcelona karya Gaudi betul-betul membuat saya langsung membuka google dan mulai mengetikkan keyword. Casa Mila.

Un-confident

I used to be this one kind of girl who always look at others and wondering why can I act like her. Why can’t I just telling the whole world about things I don’t like and things I can’t do. Why can’t I just laughing hard as if I don’t have any worry. And smiling hard like every one in the world act super nice to me.

For me at the time, even if I want to do something, there was something inside me that just holding me back. Kept my sentences inside my mouth, and kept my desire inside my heart. And there was just a silence and an awkward smile while my heart beating fast as if they wanted to be heard.

Kinasih : Good bye, Sapi!

Sebulan lebih sejak pertama kali bertemu dengan sapi yang kemudian jadi ikon kesayangan para laskar ini. Sebulan lebih sejak hari pertama harus bangun pagi dan ikut PBB dengan instruktur jap-jap. Sebulan lebih sejak hari pertama bertemu dengan meja kotak yang sudah terjejer rapi lengkap dengan nama masing-masing peserta Latsar.

Rasanya Kinasih sudah mulai menjadi bagian dari rutinitas harian yang teramat saya nikmati. Singgah ke Leonie saat istirahat siang dan cus ke CCM di malam hari sudah mulai menjadi kebiasaan. Saat rasanya waktu-waktu kuliah seperti terulang kembali, kami harus dihadapkan dengan kenyataan pahit, emm gak pahit juga sih, asam deh :D. Yap, apalagi kalau bukan kembali ke tempat penempatan.

Sirkus Pohon

Judul : Sirkus Pohon

Penulis : Andrea Hirata

Penerbit : Bentang Pustaka

Jumlah Halaman : 383

Orang-orang yang berkata tentang diri mereka sendiri, melebih-lebihkan, orang-orang yang berkata tentang orang lain, mengurang-ngurangi.

Ini adalah cerita tentang Sobridin alias Hob yang selalu ketiban sial lantaran delima, tentang Tegar dan Tara yang saling mencari tapi tak saling menemukan dan segala hal yang berkaitan dengan warung Kupi Kuli dan pemilihan kepala desa.

Seperti biasa, Andrea bercerita tentang masyarakat melayu, kebiasaan hidup mereka. Masih dengan gaya kental yang sama dengan saat ia menuliskan novel Ayah atau dwilogi Padang Bulan. Tentu tak sama dengan tetralogi Laskar Pelangi yang teramat mendunia itu karena pada dasarnya cerita yang dibuatnya kali ini adalah fiktif.